AUSTRIA-HUNGARY (Andy Jamieson)
A(Bud) s A(Ser); A(Gal) s GERMAN A(Sil) - War; A(Ser) s F(Gre); A(Tri) - Ven; F(Gre) Stands

ENGLAND (Jim O'Neil)
A(Lon) - Yor; F(SKA) - Nwy; F(StP) nc s F(SKA) - Nwy; F(ENG) - Lon

FRANCE (Paul Lacey)
A(Bel) - Edi; A(Bur) - Bel; A(Mar) - Pie; F(NTH) c A(Bel) - Edi; F(MAO) - IRI; F(Spa) sc - WMS

GERMANY (Greg Jacobson)
A(Sil) - War; A(Kie) - Mun; A(Rom) s AUSTRIAN A(Tri) - Ven; F(Nwy) s RUSSIAN F(GoB) - StP sc (MISORDER, DISLODGED TO NWG); F(Swe) s F(Nwy) (CUT); A(Pru) s A(Sil) - War; F(Den) s F(Swe)

ITALY (James Douglas)
F(TYS) - Nap; A(Pie) - Tus; A(Tun) Stands

RUSSIA (Chris Groenewald)
A(War) - Mos (FAILED, DISLODGED TO Lvn); A(Ukr) - Mos (FAILED); F(GoB) - Swe (FAILED)

TURKEY (Pablo Echevarria)
A(Sev) - Mos (FAILED); F(BLA) s A(Rum); A(Rum) s A(Con) - Bul; A(Bul) - Gre (FAILED); F(ION) s A(Bul) - Gre; A(Con) - Bul (FAILED)

Autumn 1903 Adjustments:
A: Bud, Ser, +Ven, Gre, Tri, Vie = 6; Gains 1.
E: Nwy, +StP, Lon, Lpl, -Edi = 4; No change.
F: +Edi, Bel, Mar, Por, Spa, Bre, Par = 7; Gains 1.
G: +War, Mun, +Rom, Swe, Den, Hol, Ber, Kie, -Ven = 8; Gains 1.
I: Nap, Tun, -Rom = 2; Loses 1.
R: Mos -War, -StP = 1; Loses 2.
T: Sev, Rum, Bul, Con, Ank, Smy = 6; No change.

Builds/Disbands:
A: Builds (No build ordered).
E: None.
F: Builds F(Bre).
G: Builds A(Ber).
I: Removes A(Tun).
R: Removes F(GoB), A(Ukr).
T: None.

PRESS

Anon:

Secret Enquirer, 6th Edition

Cosmology Section

Perhaps the most anticipated discovery (yet to happen) is that of the Higg's Field. We have indirect evidence of the Higg's field, but we cannot say for certain. Remember how the aether lead us down the wrong path once before.

Should the Higg's field be fact and not fiction, then the "anti gravity" theory of our current big bang model will have to be true. For once, we can be certain of the answer to the question of, "What Banged?" However, do not be mislead by this. The "Bang" was not what started the universe. No, the bang was merely a successor to a young universe (very young) and gave fruit to a ridiculously large expansion rate all be it for less then a billionth of a second.

With this in mind, we move one step closer to knowing how we came to be here.

Odds Section, Coolie Loach, Fall 1903

Germany 2:1

France 4:1

Turkey 4:1

Austria 7:1

England 20:1

Russia 50:1

Italy 50:1

Curious Section

Question:

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Answer:

Why did the chicken not stay put?

I admit it, this is a lame attempt to answer such a question. However, I believe the answer lies in the opposing side of the question that is never examined.

Question:

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

Answer:

The chicken. IF one MUST come first, the chicken can survive without the egg, but the egg cannot survive without the mother hen.

Question:

Does 1 = 0.999...

Answer:

Yes, look at previous editions of the Secret enquirer.

Question:

Do Imaginary Numbers exist in the real world?

Answer:

Yes. I will not get into it, though.

Question:

Who will win the game Coolie Loach?

Answer:

Ally Bain. He wishes. Turkey.

Stay tuned for next months SI special edition issue. There is much to be said.

ALB:

Quote from Anon, 'Question: Who will win the game Coolie Loach? Answer: Ally Bain. He wishes. Turkey'. End quote.

Actually answer from me is that it will not be Anon. :-)

Spring 1904 deadline: 5pm BST; 4th August 2006.